Monday, March 17, 2014

Simi Fehoko 3/16 7 on 7 Las Vegas

ME & HIM

Just got home from a 4 day vacation with the family.  My newly married daughter Falisha came along.  She was reading a book by Dr. Laura called "The Care and Feeding of Husbands".  I mentioned that I would like to read it, so while she was napping I grabbed it and got to it.

As I started to read, I thought to myself, "After 23 years of marriage this book can't teach me a thing!"  Ha- Well after a few chapters in- I was pleasantly surprised that I was right!  It didn't teach me anything I didn't already know.  What it did do, was give me a quick kick in the butt!  It was a shocking reminder of the day to day rhythm we have moved into.  The routine as you will.  The get the kids to where they need to go with no quick kiss or even a have a good day.  I'm sitting here just thinking- great... I gotta mix it up a bit, put my husband first again.  Is that resentment I'm feeling?  I was thinking our life was pretty good.  But after a few chapters in, I'm rethinking that.  Geez, and I'm feeling a bit foolish to be honest.  I wonder, isn't this the cycle of marriage and kids?  Fall in love, fall into a routine and live happily ever after?  Apparently not!  This marriage stuff takes WORK. It's a full time job.  I was just getting settled into this job.  Get the kids all grown up and slide into MYSELF.  Time for ME!  Well- didn't this book fall into my hands at just the right time?  I've gotta get the hubby all buttered up for the next faze of life..."ME and HIM".  The most important thing I read this week was "Women seem not to understand or underestimate the profound power they have over their husbands."  I forgot all about this!  I totally have the upper hand for my divine plan for "ME and HIM".  I will get exactly what I want if I play my cards right.

This is what I was reminded of this week, from Dr. Laura:
1. Say "I love you" often and show it even more often. Hug, kiss, and hold hands.
2. Say "Thank you" for the things he does for you. Anywhere he takes you. Any gifts he gives you.
Any money he gives you - even if it's bill money. Show gratitude by saying thank you and acknowledging his effort.
4. Be kind and sweet. Never cut him down in front of people especially your children.
5. Think the best of him. Speak the best about him to others.
6. Allow him to do his job - Lead, Provide and Protect you in the best way he knows how.
7. Love him more than you love your children. Don't put your children in front of him in your life.
8. Stand by him when he disciplines your children.
9. Go to him for strength and let him come to you for comfort.

As you can see, I'm gonna be really super busy for the next little while!  I've got to get a head start on a clean house, a yummy meal and a kiss at the door from his good looking wife!  After all, my divine plan for Me and HIM just wouldn't be the same without HIM!  If you see him smiling this week and his step a bit lighter- don't thank me, thank Dr. Laura!

Sunday, March 9, 2014

Love of FOOD


If you didn't already know by now- well let me tell you- Polynesians love food!  This meant I needed to learn how to cook well and get the proportions down to a science.  It would be an insult if we ran out of food during a family bbq!  I've learned that Clam Chowder and salads won't do.  One time Simon's dad  asked, "Where's the meat?"  Prompting a quick run to KFC.  Thus, I mastered the cooking and the supply rather quickly.   We have meat with every meal, and a lot of it.  This goes along with rice, fruit and more rice.  Having friends and family with an unending supply of food is nostalgic for me.  I'm so lucky I had a good example growing up.

My love for good food shared with friends and family started in my childhood.  My mom was an extremely great cook but didn't know the concept of small batches.  Everything was made in ginormous quantities.  With a small family of four a lot of food went to waste.  Growing up, food at my house meant good times, good company and an unending supply!  I fondly remember having my grandparents over one Sunday afternoon.  My mother made banana splits.  She brought out a plethora of toppings, flavors and fixings.  It was better than any Baskin Robbins on the planet!  Her supply of food and food options where nothing short of a buffet for every meal! 

Simon used to travel a ton for business.  Through out the years I have tagged along for extended business trips.   It's a funny thing being married for so long.  Your loves become those of your partner and vice versa.  Our vacations have become a sort of Man vs. Food adventure.  If any of you have vacationed with us you know this to be true.  We do our research and find great food flares, gorging our selves to the point of elation. Most of the places we've visited we return to on subsequent visits but there are a few that we'd like to forget.  My stomach wasn't born in Tonga.  It's weaker and can't hold as much.  But to give my stomach some credit it has only put a real damper on one extended business trip.

New Orleans a week before Mardi Gras is indeed a spectacle!  The weekend before Simon's business conference we traveled together to discover Bourbon Street.  I was excited to dance my way down the street enjoying different genres of music in neighboring pubs.  The first night upon arrival we ventured out.  The evening was strange.  Strange in a way that made you a bit confused.  People from all walks of life turned into costume clad crazies.  I felt out of sorts like a peeping tom, spying on or sitting on the fringe of insanity while walking down the street.  It felt like a dream or a movie and I was an extra.  We stopped in a pub and I ate my first oysters on a half shell, washed it down with a  good old fashioned sweet tea and headed back out.  After dinner, we were more courageous and poped in one club after another.  The music was loud, live and well worth it!  We danced forever and then made our way back to the hotel.

The next day the #1 priority was to eat a Beignet at Cafe Du Monde and a Muffuletta Sandwich anywhere they were served.  Breakfast was a hit.  Of course we didn't just eat one Beignet, but an entire bag!  They were delicious and melted in your mouth.  We did some sight seeing and then found a "Muff" sandwich, which the locals so lovingly have nicknamed.  We shared a traditional style Muff, large, round, and somewhat flattened loaf with a sturdy texture, around 10 inches across and covered with layers of marinated olive salad, mordella salami, mozzarella, ham and provolone.  Upon our return to the hotel, my stomach was a bit queasy.  I took some pepto and laid down for a nap.  We woke up to the throngs of loud music and fun radiating from Bourbon Street!  I couldn't wait to go out and squeeze into the culture for a second night.  My weakened stomach was not about to stop me.  We dressed and skipped out and entered Bourbon.  I no sooner put two steps on the sidewalk and I ran over to the gutter and knelled down to vomit.  As I was retching my guts out- the Muff sandwich not agreeing with me, I vaguely heard passerby's with comments of educated sympathy, offering my husband pity for his drunk companion.  No one came to my rescue that night with a rub on the back or to hold my hair from my face.  I stood up whipped the tears from my eyes and the spittle from my mouth turned around and said to my husband, "Why didn't you take a picture? I just puked my guts up on Bourbon street!"  He couldn't hold in the laughter and said, "Hun, you fit right in with the locals tonight.  Everyone thinks your a drunk!" We giggled together, our steps light, held hands and wound our way down the street with the costume clad crazies that night.   I think it's safe to say to all my friends and family, Don't eat a Muff sandwich- it's just not safe! :)

This week we are headed to Vegas.  We will frequent the deep fried Twinkies and Oreos on Freemont Street and maybe our friend Johnny will find us a new place to try?  I'll pack the pepto just in case!